CONSUMPTION BLOG

‘Yes We Can Do It’ Arabs Protest 9/11 Truther’s Conference

Fairfield, IA – (CN)  Thousands of Arabs, left wing activists and their enablers raged in fury today at a conference of 9/11 Truth conspiracy theorists with a simple message, ‘Yes We Can Do It.’

A couple dozen 9/11 Truthers  had gathered in the small town of Fairfield in Jeffferson County, Iowa expecting to go unnoticed as they planned strategy for the upcoming 9/11 Anniversary which organizers noted in the open plenary, ‘It’s no coincidence that 9/11 just happens to fall on September 11th – don’t you think that’s just a little weird?’  However the biggest shock to the conference attendees wasn’t the date but the several thousand protestors there to greet them.

The message of the protestors was seen on dozens of signs: ‘Yes We Can Do It’.  A spokeperson for the protestors Christine O’Donnell in full burka addressed the press.

“Arabs are more than capable and competent of committing simple acts of terrorism without help from the West.  Don’t get me wrong, Osama bin Laden, Mohammed Atta and that whole crew were turbo assholes, but Arabs can fly planes and work some box cutters without having to dial up a bunch of schmucks at Langley thank you very much.”

Another protestor Mohammed al-Rashid holding the sign displayed below angrily denounced the 9/11 Truthers. “These neo-con 9/11 conspiracy nuts are an example of Edward Said’s Orientalists critique on crack. I half expect to see Bernard Lewis’s ugly mug pop out of the meeting room.”

Conference Conspiracy Conferee Chris Cattaloni in line for a Cumin flavored Cucumber Kabob at Everybody’s Wholefoods Market in downtown Fairfield was overheard complaining, “It’s like half the town of Al-Hareeq came out to give us shit, what the fuck?”

Lead Conference organizer  and Fairfield resident John ‘Grey Ghost’ Mosby when asked for comment remarked, “Generally we are the ones protesting, so this is a bit unusual.  We also aren’t used to the press, so that’s nice I guess.  I feel bad for the town of Fairfield, they aren’t used to a whole bunch of outsiders flooding into town.”
The conference was scheduled to end tonight with a double screening of Zombie Apocalypse classic End Civ and David Lynch’s 2001 film, ‘Mulholland Dr.’